This morning after 5 long months I am over the moon to see 2 pink lines!
I think I have been staring at it for almost 15mins.
We got married September last year and I knew that meant babies soon, so I worked my ass off this year to get my A1c below 7, so in July when my results were 7.1 my husband and I decided we would start to try knowing that I had just switched to the pump back in June, my A1c would for sure be below 7 in no time.
Every month since July I got my hopes up and every month mother nature still arrived sometime a day or two late and it was externally frustrating. I have had tons of people asking if we were trying, even asking if I am permeate... like what did they expect me to say YES we are and No it hasn't happen, or YES I am even thought I obviously wouldn't be ready to share the news...
PUBLIC NOTICE- you have no idea how someone might struggle with something like this, if they have not shared this information with you then maybe they are not comfortable... it is not okay to ask!
I guess I am just a little nervous, yes I have diabetes but I believe I have this all under control- still doesn't mean I am not scared shitless to miscarry or harm my baby, with high and low blood sugars! and on top of it all this thyroid thing that my endo seems to think will manage it self- take god I am seeing him next week because I have freaked myself out goggling untreated thyroid conditions during pregnancy- as if diabetes and pregnancy wasn't enough to deal with!
Anyways rant over, and fingers crossed the next 9 months go smoothly.
Written Nov 20th at 3weeks 6days
Tuesday 2 February 2016
Fears
So its been only 1 week since I took an at home pregnancy test, that showed those 2 pink lines that would change our lives. I am scared! We haven't told anyone yet and I feel so emotional (not something I normal am).
My symptoms so far are only mid craping and sore boobs. Why am I not throwing up and exhausted?
this make me nervous, not that I want to feel that way, but I think it would help me feel more pregnant and that my little poppy seed is on track.
I think any women who finds she is pregnant has fears, but as a type 1 diabetic I feel like my fears are X100! I feel like everyone I know right now is announcing their pregnancies which is such a beautiful thing, I pray I will be able to do so in a few months. I worry! Did that drink I had on my husbands birthday affect my baby before I knew I was pregnant, or that day I forgot my blood glucose meter at home last week?? :( or the fact that my CGM was not working properly Monday and Tuesday of this week? Is my A1c still 6.3% because according to my CGM my average sugar is 8!!! ugh... or how about this cold I have had for a week and 1/2 and the fact that I took Advil and Buckley's before knowing I really wish I had all the answers to my questions.
Its going to be a long 9 months!
Written Nov 27th at 4weeks 6days
My symptoms so far are only mid craping and sore boobs. Why am I not throwing up and exhausted?
this make me nervous, not that I want to feel that way, but I think it would help me feel more pregnant and that my little poppy seed is on track.
I think any women who finds she is pregnant has fears, but as a type 1 diabetic I feel like my fears are X100! I feel like everyone I know right now is announcing their pregnancies which is such a beautiful thing, I pray I will be able to do so in a few months. I worry! Did that drink I had on my husbands birthday affect my baby before I knew I was pregnant, or that day I forgot my blood glucose meter at home last week?? :( or the fact that my CGM was not working properly Monday and Tuesday of this week? Is my A1c still 6.3% because according to my CGM my average sugar is 8!!! ugh... or how about this cold I have had for a week and 1/2 and the fact that I took Advil and Buckley's before knowing I really wish I had all the answers to my questions.
Its going to be a long 9 months!
Written Nov 27th at 4weeks 6days
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